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Being Normal In A Caped World Would Suck

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Growing up, I read a lot of comic books and watched shows based off those comic books. I always thought, “Man, it would be so cool to live in that world! A world with caped heroes, acts of heroism, superpowers, fights of good vs evil, etc.”. But now that I’ve gotten older it’s dawned on me, being a common person in that world would absolutely suck.

You would think that a world with Caped Heroes would be fun and exciting, but the reality is that it would be a very scary place to live unless you had powers yourself. The common person would be kind of screwed, and at the mercy of those with the power. Not to mention, at any given point you could instantly be in the way of harm, from bad guys trying to take over the city or debris in the latest superhero scuffle.

Superhero Fights!

So think about it. The Incredible Hulk, Thor and Iron Man 2 all take place within the same month in the Marvel Cinematic Universe. In each movie, something major happens that is absolutely catastrophic. You have Devastator Armor running amuck in New Mexico, the Hulk being chased by military, and Tony Stark fighting off Ivanko’s Drone Army. In each of these movies, there are HUGE amounts of destruction unfolding. There are bombs going off, heroes and villains being thrown through buildings, chases, bullets and debris flying everywhere, and that’s just what we see on screen with the “Major Villains”. Imagine what goes on in between these epic brawls!

What a lot of the movies leave out is the smaller scale things that happen within the comic book universes. There are plenty of villains like “The Frightful Four”, “Whirlwind” and “Batroc the Leaper” that are just in it to rob a few banks, make a big score and retire to some part of South America. They want a short term plan, with long term gain, and to get out at any costs. And taking an even further step back, you still have to deal with everyday crime in the comic book universes. Even if there isn’t a grand scale fight, there is bound to be some collateral damage when a hero comes to “save the day”.  Living in these types of conditions would make me want to hide in an underground bunker til the day I would eventually die.

“We have Super Heroes so they’ll stop the villains before anything major happens!”

One thing that most people don’t realize is that there are more villains with the henchmen than there are superheroes. In “The Dark Knight”, Commissioner Gordon states that “Batman’s so busy stopping other crimes that he never even gets to the Bat Signal!”. So you can only imagine that the rest of the caped crusaders have similar issues. Too many criminals and villains, not enough people with powers to stop them all.

“Well, I’ll just avoid major cities then.”

To a certain extent, that may not be the worst strategy if you’re the normie living in a hero and villain world. Most of the villains seem to thrive in the big cities, making it their playgrounds. So living out in the middle of nowhere where it’s less populated might help you with your day to day villains. But let’s not forget that some villains want more than just money. There are some looking to take over the world, to watch it burn, and living outside of the city isn’t going to save you from the world ending events they may unleash.

In the comic books, there is also a typical annual cross over event where all the good guy’s team up, and sometimes the bad guy’s team up too, in order to stop someone or something from destroying the world (or universe) as we know it. So at the very least, once a year everyone on the planet is puckering up their butts in hopes that the world doesn’t end. I don’t know about you, but that sounds absolutely horrible. I’d probably need to constantly be on Xanax just to deal with the anxiety of the possible, impending doom. Because one day, the good guys may not be able to stop whatever they’re facing and BOOM! The world’s over.

Speaking of “world ending” events, there are a ton of evil organizations that want to take over the world and enforce their oppressive regime on everyone. You have groups like Hydra, Aim, The Hand, Hive, Legion of Doom, League of Assasins, just to name a few. They all are always trying to take over the world, and in many cases, these organizations have an army at their disposal of people who believe in the cause and would die fighting for it. Some of them even have powers as well. And not only do they try to attack the common people, but they’ll also take out anyone that stands in their way. From heroes to other organizations who are trying to be the dominant power. Everyone is a threat, which makes no one safe.

I wouldn’t wish the cape world on any of us. For now, I’m much happier taking my chances out here on our somewhat normal Earth.